1、英语小笑话：Two Pieces of Cake 两块蛋糕学而不思则罔，思而不学则殆，以下是爱岗敬业的小编Waner帮家人们找到的11篇英语小笑话的相关范文，希望对大家有所启发。

浅显易懂的英语小笑话 篇一

It's not my fault 不是我的错

It's not my fault

Mother (reprimanding训斥，谴责 her small daughter): You mustn't pull the cat's tail.

Daughter: I'm only holding it, Mom. The cat's doing the pulling.

不是我的错

妈妈(正教训她的女儿)：你不该拽猫的尾巴。

女儿：妈，我只是握着猫尾巴，它自己在拽。

儿童英语简短爆笑小笑话 篇二

Who Is the Laziest 谁懒

Father: Well, Tom, I asked to your teacher today, and now I want to ask you a question. Who is the laziest person in your class?

Tom: I don't know, father.

Father: Oh, yes, you do! Think! When other boys and girls are doing and writing, who sits in the class and only watches how other people work?

Tom: Our teacher, father.

父亲：哎，汤姆，今天我跟你们老师谈过，现在我想问你个问题。你们班上谁懒？

汤姆：我不知道，爸爸。

父亲：啊，不对，你知道！想想看，当别的孩子们都在做作业、写字时，谁在课堂上坐着，只是看人家做功课？

汤姆：我们老师，爸爸。

英语幽默小笑话 篇三

财政学的一课

Smith was the manager of a construction'，event)">construction company and was taking bids on a new project. The first bidder was a Polish company, and their representative offered to do the job for $ 400,000.

"That seems reasonable," said Smith. "Can you give me a breakdown on that?"

史密斯是一家建设公司的经理，他正负责一个新工程的招标案。第一位投标的是一家波兰公司，他们的代表出价四十万元接那个案子。“似乎很合理，”史密斯说。“你可不可以给我一张明细表呢？”

"Sure," said the Pole, " $200, 000 for labor and $ 200,000 for materials. "

“当然没问题，”波兰公司代表说道，“廿万元工资，廿万元材科费。”

Next to make a bid was the Standard American Construction'，event)">Construction Company, which bid $ 800,000.

下一个出标的是美国标准建设公司，他们以八十万元竞标。

"Hmm, that seems a bit high," said Smith. "What's the breakdown?"

“嗯，这个价钱似乎有些偏高，”史密斯说道。“你们有明细表吗？’

" $ 400,000 0n materials, $ 400,000 0n labor. "

“四十万元材料，四十万元工资。”

"I'll get back to you. "

“我以后再同你联系。”

Finally the representative of Cohen, Goldstein and Leibowitz entered Smith's office.

最后可翰·高斯坦·雷伯威兹公司的代表走进史密斯办公室。“一百廿万元是我们竞标的价码，”代表说道。

" $ 1,200,000 is our bid," said the agent."$11 200, 0001 That' s way out of line," exclaimed Smith. "Can you give me a brea kdown on that?"

“一百廿万元这个标高得太过分了，”史密斯叫道：“你可以给我一张明细表吗？"

"No problem," replied the rep. " $400, 000 for me,$ 400 ， 000 for you and $ 400 。 000 for the Polacks.

“没有问题，”代表回答道。“四十万元给我，四十万元给你，最后四十万元则给那家波兰佬开的公司。”

简单的中英文对照英语笑话：Get to the hospital 医院要怎么走 篇四

An absent-minded person was standing in the middle of a busy intersection where a policeman was directing traffic, and he kept bugging the policeman because he was confused.

"Excuse me, Officer! Can you tell me how to get to the hospital?"

The officer was very busy and said, "Just stand here and you'll get there!"

有个很健忘的人站在车水马龙的十字路口正中央，那里有个警察正忙着指挥交通，而他不断地去干扰这位值勤的警员，因为他搞不清楚方向。

他问道：“请问一下，警察先生，可以告诉我医院要怎么走吗？”

这个忙不过来的警察对他说：“就站在这里，你就会到医院了！”

浅显易懂的英语小笑话 篇五

狗也知道这个谚语吗？

The little boy did not like the look of the barking dog.

"It's all right," said a gentleman, "don't be afraid. Don't you know the proverb: Barking dogs don't bite?"

"Ah, yes," answered the little boy. "I know the proverb, but does the dog know the proverb, too?"

一个小男孩非常不喜欢狗狂叫的样子。

“没有关系，”一位先生说，“不用害怕，你知道这条谚语吗：‘吠狗不咬人。’”

“啊，我是知道，可是狗也知道吗？”

儿童英语简短爆笑小笑话 篇六

鸡蛋

Teacher: Can you make a sentence with the word "egg"?

Student: Yes. I ate a piece of cake yesterday.

Teacher: Then where is the "egg"?

Student: In the cake, Sir.

老师：你能用“鸡蛋”一词造句吗？

学生：可以。我昨天吃了一块蛋糕。

老师：“鸡蛋”在哪？

学生：在蛋糕里，先生。

儿童英语简短爆笑小笑话 篇七

A small boy was looking at the red ripe tomatoes growing in the farmer's garden.

"I'll give you my two pennies for that tomato," said the boy pointing to a beautiful, large, ripe fruit hanging on the vine.

"No," said the farmer, "I get a dime for a tomato like that one."

The small boy pointed to a smaller green one, "Will you take two pennies for that one?"

"Yes," replied the farmer, "I'll give you that one for two cents."

"OK," said the lad, sealing the deal by putting the coins in the farmer's hand, "I'll pick it up in about a week."

简短英语笑话带翻译 篇八

Someone asked a woman, "I see that you wear a locket on your neck. It must be a very dearmemento from some loved one." The woman said, "Yes, it is a lock of my husband's hair." So the friend said, "Wow! You are so sentimental! But your husband is still alive. Is it necessary?" And the woman said, "Yes! I know, but his hair is all gone."

有人问一位女士：“我看你的脖子上戴着一条心锁项链，这里面一定有你所爱的人的珍贵纪念物。”那位女士回答说：“是啊，里面珍藏着我先生的头发。”朋友接着说：“哇！多么浓情蜜意啊！但你的丈夫还活着，有这个必要吗？”那位女士说：“是啊！我知道，但是他的头发已经全部掉光了！”

简短英语笑话带翻译 篇九

Teacher: Would you rather have one half of an orange or five tenths?

Gerald: I'd much rather have the half.

Teacher: Think carefully, and tell me why.

Gerald: Because you lose too much juice when you cut the orange into five tenths.

老师：你愿意要半个柑橘，还是十分之五个柑橘？

杰拉得：我宁可要半个。

老师：仔细想想，说出理由来。

杰拉得：因为你如果把柑橘切成十分之五，那柑橘汁就损失太多了。

浅显易懂的英语小笑话 篇十

Where's the father? 父亲在哪？

Two brothers were looking at some beautiful paintings.

"Look," said the elder brother. "How nice these paintings are!"

"Yes," said the younger, "but in all these paintings there is only the mother and the children. Where is the father?"

The elder brother thought for a moment and then explained, "Obviously he was painting the pictures."

兄弟俩在看一些漂亮的油画。

“看，”哥哥说，“这些画多漂亮呀！”

“是啊，”弟弟说道，“可是在所有这些画中，只有妈妈和孩子。那爸爸去哪儿了呢？”

哥哥想了一会儿，然后解释道：“很明显，他当时正在画这些画呗。

简短英语笑话带翻译 篇十一

One student to another: "How are your English lessons coming along?" "Fine. I used to be one who couldn't understand the English men, and now it's the English men who can't understand me."

一位学生对另一位说：“你的 英语 最近学的怎么样？” “很好，我过去不懂英国人说话，可现在是英国人不懂我的话了。”